I love the children’s book entitled “Broken Crayons Still Color” by Toni Collier, because it’s such a powerful metaphor for how so many of us move through life. If you look up ‘broken’ in the dictionary, you’ll see something to the effect of: ‘having been fractured, damaged, and no longer in one piece or in working order.’ Using that definition, to say a crayon split in half is “broken” is narrow-minded, because while it is certainly no longer in one piece, it does still perform its primary function. It colors.
In fact, I’d argue it’s a more valuable tool for coloring – a broken crayon actually has more surface area, it can color from multiple angles, reach into the hard-to-get small spaces, has more ways to express color, and can even be shared between two hands. So I don’t think it’s fair to say a crayon split in two is broken at all, I think more appropriate to say that crayon has been transformed, has expanded, or even reshaped.
As humans, we are so quick to see imperfection, hardship, trauma, or pain as permanent dents that render us ‘lesser than’ perfectly pointed crayon in new box. However, like crayons we aren’t meant to stay in perfect form – we must live and create outside the box, and as a result no two crayons end up looking the same since life has a way of reshaping us to color in new, and beautiful ways.
There were so many ways I personally felt broken as a child due to my lived experiences. I was the product of divorced parents, suffered years of sexual abuse, struggled academically, and was teased for being overweight to name a few, but upon further reflection the experiences that shaped me weren’t even the worst part. The most devastating effects have been wrapped up in the ideas I developed about myself – beliefs I formed about my worth and my value that I’ve carried into adulthood unbeknownst to me as a result of those challenges. I only became aware of them when I finally got intentional about improving my health and embarking on a quest for meaningful joy. It’s incredible the lessons we pick up along the way and ultimately internalize, only to convince ourselves we’re ok by staying busy and wearing that busy-ness like a badge of honor.
I did this subconsciously for years, endlessly working to earn my worth through external accomplishments or as I like to say – the ‘five p’s’: promotions at work, praise, productivity, people pleasing, and putting the needs of others above my own. Living in this state of survival mode worked for a while, until the emotional turmoil within finally showed itself in physical form with severe digestive symptoms, anxiety, and joint pain. Reaching the end of my rope is what led me on an unexpected journey to heal my mind, body, and spirit and was able to see my weathered self through an entirely different lens.
I realized the pain, solitude, and suffering turned me into a more compassionate and resilient human being, and that it was those hardships that gave me the courage to ultimately tell my story in order to help others change their lives for the better. Learning to truly love yourself, just as you are, is the most effective way to find more happiness and better health. It will not only change you, but your family and children for the better as well. This isn’t just lip service either, because your energy speaks truths your words and mannerisms cannot hide. Reframing the ‘brokenness’ within ourselves is the best kept secret that changes everything – not just you, but the world around you.
It is also the most valuable gift we can give our kids – teaching them how to truly love themselves versus providing them visions of unattainable perfection, or trying to protect them from all of life’s challenges along the way. They will get dents, they will transform, but what matters is how we help them see themselves in the world despite the perceived ‘brokenness’. And, lucky for us – only the other broken crayons can teach them this lesson, not the perfect ones sitting idly in the box.
Your most difficult challenges, the things you went through that ‘broke’ you are what shape you into a more expanded, multi-dimensional version of yourself so whatever you’ve been through, color anyway. Leave your mark. Bring beauty to the world in your own unique way, and trust that your dents and sharp edges are allowing you to color in ways that nobody else can. Love yourself deeply, purposefully, and uncompromisingly, no matter how life has reshaped you just remember: you are still vibrant, worthy, and capable of creating something beautiful.
Chandler Stroud is a sought-after wellness expert who has helped countless women transform their lives by addressing their emotional, mental, and physical health holistically. Her message resonates with high-achieving women who are ready to prioritize their healing journey, release stress, and step into their full potential.
Chandler says, “At the end of the day, I’m teaching women how to come home to and ultimately love themselves again using these practices as the key to lasting happiness.”
For more information, please visit Chandler Stroud ‘s podcast page
